32 The curtains and tapestries had appeared over the windows before Marina had died, growing moldy from the dampness and the oils of lavender, clove, and clary sage soaking them. She became more and more alive, not so much to a system of ideas as to a big diffused impulse toward change, to a great discontent with and criticism of life as it is lived, to a clamorous confusion of ideas for reconstruction—reconstruction of the methods of business, of economic development, of the rules of property, of the status of children, of the clothing and feeding and teaching of every one; she developed a quite exaggerated consciousness of a multitude of people going about the swarming spaces of London with their minds full, their talk and gestures full, their very clothing charged with the suggestion of the urgency of this pervasive project of alteration. It will give me great pleasure to settle an annuity for a moderate amount upon you on certain conditions. Women to me are something so serene, so fine, so feminine, and politics are so dusty, so sordid, so wearisome and quarrelsome. It may be instinctive; it may be that children vaguely realize that at the end of all wedding journeys is disillusion. The man was mad to marry me. She expanded that. But it is all very different. She meant to leave anyway, or so she would tell herself later. ” He ruminated for a minute. I'll think no more about her. ‘Why do you stand there? Take him up, and bring him out at once. ‘Jacques?’ she called.
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